agoraphobia girl summer
we all agree that everything and everyone is unwell rn yes? there is sympathy for the tyrant and no sympathy for the children and dogs are burning their paws on the sidewalk and the last jasmine blossoms have turned crusty and brown and tangle in your hair when you’re just trying to walk, because walking helps things. we’re languishing under a taurean mars-uranus conjunction, zipping towards a full moon in capricorn—a chaotic flow, but at least on a cosmic scale we’re still just bugs.
last week i turned in a full first draft of the book (!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!) and since then i’ve been micro-dosing the elation-relief-grief-anxiety rollercoaster that everyone says happens when you release something really important to you. i’ve been thinking a lot about how digital language is this condensed, straight-to-the-point thing (it has to be, to hold our fleeting attention), and how as a result i feel frustrated sometimes by the ways my brain struggles to play/expand/make connections within writing. this book is a lot of things for me, and in particular, it’s been beautiful to scare and surprise myself with language again.
anyway… i’ve also become mildly agoraphobic? maybe it’s the heat or the horrors, or how i’m trying to save money, or maybe i finally found that elusive artistic discipline—but i want to stay home.
in service of that sentiment, here are some nice, cheap, user-tested things to do by yourself at home this summer:
watch a video about cleaning your window AC unit. commit to cleaning AC unit at some future date, maybe during your next agoraphobic episode. preparation is key
read. i’m just finishing i’m a fan by sheena patel, super funny and feral and the unhinged british hot girl vibes feel very on point during this brat summer. on my nightstand: more, please by great writer and friend emma specter, all fours by miranda july, and margo’s got money troubles by rufi thorpe.
take a deep dive into olive oil MLM tiktok. a heady blend of scamming, pseudo-wellness, and everyone’s favorite low-smoke-point lubricant
pretend you are at the yard house with your southern belles
watch the bachelorette and also every iteration of love island. i think jenn is a lovely bachelorette; her men so far are…eh, but production feels very on the ball this season. full disclosure, i haven’t seen love island USA yet but literally everyone says it’s an incredible season. like normal healthy people, my husband and i are using a manchester VPN to stream the UK series five days before it hits hulu. if anyone else is caught up, please hit me up to discuss mimii on the terrace!!
collage
go through your closet aka try on all your clothes
melt down your tunneled candles and put new wicks in them
make elaborate salads. a good salad can take 70 minutes to construct if you’re brave
wash your makeup brushes—they’re probably gross!!!
also don’t worry—this is not a cry for help, i swear i am appropriately social! astrologists will say it’s cancer season, everyone will say it’s crazy out there and also expensive so why not wash your makeup brushes. tonight i’m venturing outside to taix, LA’s historic camp french bistro whose name no one knows how to pronounce, for martinis and french fries with friends i haven’t seen in a while. preview of tonight at taix:
happy introversion to all who celebrate xx
aiden